On Friday, March 9, 2012 I woke you up in the morning and you cried and told me that you were tired of waking up in the middle of the night for corn starch, so I decided that if the glucose level was good at bed time, I will wake up at 3am, check it again and if it is still good, I will let you sleep through the night. We did that for the next 5 nights and everything was great, you woke up smiling, in a good mood, and I was so happy about it.
But then, on Wednesday morning my world came crushing down around me when in the morning your glucose level was 1.8! You were symptomatic, shaky hands, cold sweats. I gave you orange juice and some sugar, while waiting for the pancake. I checked the glucose level again in 10 minutes and it went down to 1.7! That's when I panicked, I called Daddy to tell him to meet us at McMaster and I called 911 and after that I did another check. It went up to 3.4. Oh, the relief! The first paramedic arrived in 10-15 very, very long minutes. When Doug, the paramedic walked in, I was so happy to see him I wanted to cry. I don't think I've ever been so happy to see anybody lately as I was to see this paramedic. I told him that the glucose level is going up and he asked me if I wanted him to give you a shot of glucose. I told him I don't think it's necessary, but to go ahead, if he thinks one is still needed for your safety. He didn't give you one and asked me if I still want to bring you to ER. I said I don't think so and he offered to stay with us for a while to make sure you are ok. Later, 2 other paramedics came and Doug was speaking with them in the living room. When he came in the kitchen, you asked him what are the paramedics' names. He introduced them, Josh and Bill.
I called Daddy, who was on his way and he came home to make sure his Princess is fine. And he remained home for the rest of the day, didn't go back to work.
There were very few times in my life when I felt truly scared and when I think about it, I realize every one of this times is related to your safety. There is nothing more scary in this world than when it comes to a parent's child's life and safety.
So, since then (it's been a week), I do wake you up every night for the corn starch, regardless of how high your glucose level is. I rather you are tired than not safe. And, besides, there's only four months left of the treatment and then about 2 more until the glucose level stabilizes and we can sleep through the night.
We love you very much, more than anything in the world and your safety comes first. No matter how tired we all are, we are not going to take another chance.